Can a separated Dad be a great father? Sure, but maybe a divorced man should also ask Why are you saying that? Just because you’re not divorced, it does not mean that you are a great father. It’s really such a pity that our society considers someone as a dead beat parent just because he’s divorced. There are a lot of amazing divorced fathers out there and you can learn a lot from them.
Understanding it. You have got to realise that children suffer a great deal from the consequences of having only one parent. It could have from irate parents, from separation anxiety or any number of things: it’s a tough world out there for children whose parents are divorced, getting divorced, or who are just single.
Appearing to carry on as normal for the kids require sacrifice. Usually, both mother and father have to be able to set aside their differences long enough to inspect the damage that they have both done to their children. More often than not though, parents get so engrossed with their emotional grief, that they fail to notice that their children are suffering even more than they are.
If you are a single parent this is even more difficult. Dating for Dads and dating for mothers is the answer – don’t rush into things, but children need two parents and when you’re ready, you should get another partner.
Studies show that when two parents make a conscious effort to stay close to each other, then they have more successful and stable children. What more do you have to know? Kids need two parents. Never think that dating for single dads is out of the question. In fact, it is vital for the kids. You know that it is, don’t you?
A Formal Study: To emphasize the importance of a father’s closeness to his children, the State University of Arizona conducted a study of college students whose parents were divorced. The researchers observed personality, emotional and mental maturity, health, and even interest in school and success. The researchers found facts that support the idea that whoever had primary custody, it is certain that children need access to adults of both sexes.
Findings: The findings are very interesting. Statistics clearly shows that children whose parents are divorced have healthier and more mature relationships than their parents and make a conscious effort of keeping the essence of family intact.
61% of the kids involved in the study asserted that their mum or whoever had primary custody, moved them at least an hours drive away from the other parent. One of the concerns expressed by the students was getting in the crossfire. When they stay with one parent, future financial help (like for college) lessened. Example, if they stayed with dad, mom gives less when college comes, and vice versa. In fact, the investigation showed that the 1 hour driving distance already had a negative effect on the children.
There will be emotional disturbance, it cannot really be prevented, but upon closer inspection of the children involved, it was clearly shown that those whose parents stayed close to them had a better emotional disposition and a better mentally too.
Results: so, in a nut-shell, the case study demonstrates that divorce does affect the kids. The way the parents treat each other and the distance they live apart does have a very significant impact that could tip the scales as to whether a child succeeds or not. It is difficult to make friends with an ex-wife after all that has transpired, but it will be even more difficult for you as a divorced or separated Dad, when you see your children suffer from the consequences of your decisions.
As a single Dad, it is really up to you. You owe it to yourself and to your children to make first step to staying close to your children.
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